Going for overseas training soon.... 2 more days to be exact... Having a bit of a mix feeling. Excited yet sianz about the whole thing... Excited because it will be interesting place to train in. Sianz because of the activities that are going to take place there. And I am pretty sure a lot of things are gonna screw up and I am gonna be screwed for it too. That's not too bad if I am the one responsible for it. The problem with my job and my organisation is that we are always being screwed for things that are beyond our control... sighz... shan't talk too much abt it. Kinda classified also... can say much...
Definitely gonna miss Jas a lot. Can't really have a peace of mind cuz Jas is gonna have her 'A's during my absence... and I really feel bad not being able to be there for her during this tough period.... Sorry darling.... I promised I will buy you lots of nice stuffs when I come back okie~! Think of the bright side... my coming back will signify the last day of your exam~! Let's all look forward to that day.
Gonna to take my Class 2B TP Test the moment I come back... Hope can pass it on my first attempt. Heard from a lot of pple that there are quotas for each day and usually they won't let pple pass the first time. Well, still gotta try anyway. Even if its true that they dun pass first timer, does that mean that I'm gonna sit there and wait? Of course not. Gotta make the first step. If they really fail me the first time round (like what everyone say) at least I know that I would stand a chance on my second time~! For those out there who have nothing better to do... pray for me....
Wednesday, October 27, 2004
Friday, October 22, 2004
Finally ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yeah~!!!!!!!!!!! I finally booked my Class 2B Practical Test~!!! It will be on 24 Nov 2004. Just a few days after I come back from overseas training~! I am gonna book a few more revision lesson before I go for the test. I wanna pass first time~! So happy now. After so damn long, finally got it.
All you guys out there better wish me good luck okie~! =P
All you guys out there better wish me good luck okie~! =P
Wednesday, October 20, 2004
Friday, October 15, 2004
Irritated...
Damn irritated today. Rush to the Dental Centre early in the morning for a dental check up. Appointment was at 8.50 am and being a good soldier, I went there about 10mins earlier. Got a queue number and waited..... and waited.... and waited...... until 11pm~! Fark man.... what the hell~! My queue number was 11. The number on the screen was 5 when I reach there 8.50am and when i stormed off at 11pm its still at number 9~! Seriously screwed up. This just show that the dentist has a very very poor time management. How can he possibly give me an appointment time of 8.50am when he has so many patients on hand? Dental Centre starts work at 8am and common sense would have told anyone that he can't attend to 11 guys within 50 mins. I mean, being a dentist for so long, he still does not know how to plan his time, how to allocated the correct amount of time for a particular patient's condition (check-up or x-ray or surgery etc)?
Cannot take it anymore, so I just walked to the medic, ask him to strike my name off and went away. Didn't bother to take my record card anymore cuz I am not gonna go back there anymore. Rather spend some money outside. At least I bet the dentist outside would respect my time. I don't have the whole day to wait for him to give me a 10mins dental check.
That is really the problem with army's doctors and dentists. No matter how many patients they attend to, they still get the same old pathetic pay every month. Its not their own business and they are not earning anything from it, so they would just take their own time and do everything slowly. Attend to 10 guys get X amount of money. Attend to 100 guys also get X amount of money. Which idiot would wanna do more for the same amount? Damn irritated. This crap gotta change....
Cannot take it anymore, so I just walked to the medic, ask him to strike my name off and went away. Didn't bother to take my record card anymore cuz I am not gonna go back there anymore. Rather spend some money outside. At least I bet the dentist outside would respect my time. I don't have the whole day to wait for him to give me a 10mins dental check.
That is really the problem with army's doctors and dentists. No matter how many patients they attend to, they still get the same old pathetic pay every month. Its not their own business and they are not earning anything from it, so they would just take their own time and do everything slowly. Attend to 10 guys get X amount of money. Attend to 100 guys also get X amount of money. Which idiot would wanna do more for the same amount? Damn irritated. This crap gotta change....
Thursday, October 14, 2004
The tempo is building up....
Had a freaking busy day. Whole day meeting. Had meeting from 1.30pm until 8pm~! No lunch break, no dinner break. Only a short 5 mins break at 3pm~! Piangz... Tempo is building up. We are gonna be real busy. Overseas training coming up end Oct. Another one coming up in Jan. And the "best" thing is that we kena NDP05. The WHOLE Pre-Parade segment belongs to us~! "Congrats"~!!!! Anything.... Anything and EVERYTHING before the Marching Contignents march out belongs to us. In case you people don't know what that means, it means things like the combined school choir, the school band, emcees, freefallers, pre-parade show, audience etc etc... Brain overloaded... sigh... don't wanna think too much now... take a step at a time and pray.....
Boss is really busy. He's going off on Sat and he is still in camp attending meetings, and doing work. Even Sat morning he has to attend a meeting too. His wife is really not happy. Was chatting with him and Isaac just now when his wife called. He was suppose to pick his wife up after her work and he was 2 hours late. And she is still waiting in the office. Can understand why she got mad but then again, boss is really not having a good time either. Sighz... Seeing them quarrel really reminds me of what everyyone's saying. Its tough being a soldier's wife. How many girls can actually endure the kind of endless work her husband is involved in, minimum time with her and at the end of the day, too tired for anything else.... Never mind... just hope that boss managed to work it out with his wife.
To tired to do anything now. Best is to sleep and I shall do just that....zzzzZZZZZzzzzz
Boss is really busy. He's going off on Sat and he is still in camp attending meetings, and doing work. Even Sat morning he has to attend a meeting too. His wife is really not happy. Was chatting with him and Isaac just now when his wife called. He was suppose to pick his wife up after her work and he was 2 hours late. And she is still waiting in the office. Can understand why she got mad but then again, boss is really not having a good time either. Sighz... Seeing them quarrel really reminds me of what everyyone's saying. Its tough being a soldier's wife. How many girls can actually endure the kind of endless work her husband is involved in, minimum time with her and at the end of the day, too tired for anything else.... Never mind... just hope that boss managed to work it out with his wife.
To tired to do anything now. Best is to sleep and I shall do just that....zzzzZZZZZzzzzz
Monday, October 11, 2004
Saturday, October 09, 2004
Exorcists~!
Watch the Exorcists today. Fucking scary show... actually the story itself was not really scary lahz.... just that the sound effect make ppl scare. Typical horror movie. Nice show to watch~!
Thursday, October 07, 2004
4 Year Anniversary~!
Celebated our 4th Year Anniversary today. Somehow, we managed to leave all the unhappiness aside and celebrate this occassion happily.
Went to Jack's Place for dinner. She had the fire steak while I tried the black pepper steak. Mine's not too nice. Maybe because I don't like the taste of black pepper. Plus I guess my portion was not cook well enough. Ordered medium rare but it turn out too bloody. Lazy to get a change or complain so just ate everything. Not too bad. Still prefer the fire steak.
Went to Mt Faber after that to exchange present as planned. It really makes me happy to see her exclaimed in joy when she see the crumpler bag and the body lotion I bought for her. She got me a ripcurl t-shirt with some nice design. Nice.
Pretty tired... gonna sleep....
Went to Jack's Place for dinner. She had the fire steak while I tried the black pepper steak. Mine's not too nice. Maybe because I don't like the taste of black pepper. Plus I guess my portion was not cook well enough. Ordered medium rare but it turn out too bloody. Lazy to get a change or complain so just ate everything. Not too bad. Still prefer the fire steak.
Went to Mt Faber after that to exchange present as planned. It really makes me happy to see her exclaimed in joy when she see the crumpler bag and the body lotion I bought for her. She got me a ripcurl t-shirt with some nice design. Nice.
Pretty tired... gonna sleep....
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
Tuesday, October 05, 2004
Broken hearted.....
Planned to type so many things over here today but when I am facing the screen now... I don't know what to type. Had a freaking busy day cuz some big shot came to visit my unit. Was running everywhere to coordinate everything. Stressed. But its all over. Not too bad after all. Well like the saying goes, "The only easy day was yesterday"....
Spoke to boss yesterday while he was driving me home. He told me its very tough to be a soldier's wife or girlfriend.... he is the 3rd person to tell me this... my ex boss, my boss's boss.... all told me before... and I must agree. Being a soldier's girl is really no easy task.... looking at the kind of working hours we have, the number of overseas trips, the number of OT and stuffs like that... Not many girls can take it.... I think about her, and all the years that we've spent together... it really saddened me that things have to end up this way. I always believe that any couples that can endure and pull through the hardship of a guy's military career, is a couple that will last. Only true love can withstand such terrible times a guy have to go through. Our relationship went through many obstacles. We went through many rough times since the day we got together. 4 years is neither long nor short... but it certainly brings back lots of memories. I did the most foolish thing in my life by breaking her heart and destroying her trust for me. Trust.... once broken, its hard to build again. She gave me another chance and I promised myself never to break her heart again. I cherish her more than anything else. But the scar is still there. She still finds it hard to believe in me.
She blasts at me again on sunday.... over something that I really thought nothing of.... its just chatting with a poly classmate without telling her. As much as I thought its nothing, she sees it as a big issue. A big issue of broken promise. I was stunned by the outbreak as I really did not expect it. I could not believe that she can actually lashes out on me over things like that. As angry and upset as I were, I do not blame her. She has all the rights to be angry. She has all the rights to choose not to trust me. She has all the rights to feel insecure. I am not blaming her.... she is not wrong. But I did not think that I was wrong too. My heart was totally shattered when she say that we should stay away from each other for a while... does that mean a breakup? I really do not know. How do you find solution to a problem where both party feel that no one is in the wrong?
Maybe I really don't understand her enough. From my point of view, a lot of such quarrels can be avoided. If she sees that I am talking to someone and wish to know who is that person, she can always ask, and I'll be more than willing to tell her. But she choose to remain silence and wait for me to tell her. And if its slips my mind or if I forget to tell her. She'll lash out on me. Is this on purpose? I don't know. Quote an example..... you are driving on the expressway and on the expressway you are EXPECTED to travel at high speed. You are travelling at a high speed when from far you saw this car in front of you braking and is slowing down. Would you:
1. Maintain your speed. Cuz its an expressway and you don't give a damn why he slows down.
2. Slow down you vehicle to avoid a collision. Alternatively, change lane,
What would you choose? If you co-relate this to our problem, she choose answer 1. She know that if I slip my mind and forget to tell her things, she'll get angry, we'll quarrel and everyone will be unhappy. But she insist on keeping quiet. Why? Because I am expected to remember to tell her everything so if I forget, then I deserve the unhappiness. But am I only one who will be unhappy? Think about it.
If she choose answer 2, she would prompt me by asking me who am I talking to. I'll tell her. In that way, she gets to know what she wants, I get to say what I gotta say. Everyone is happy. Doesn't this makes more sense?
Why do you choose to remain silent? Why do you insist on seeing your car crash on the car in front? What do you benefit from the crash? Nothing. I don't know if anyone understand the example I'm trying to co-relate with. It just comes into my mind as I type.
I don't know.... we can be enjoying each others company so much and yet time and time again quarrel over such small issue. I say small issue because I see it as something that can be solved. Just a matter of both party putting in more effort. I am wrong cuz I forgot. You are not totally blameless too cuz you fail to ask me. Why always quarrel this? I have so many friends, I speak to so many people, how would I remember to report to you everything and how many more times do we have to quarrel over this?
I've been looking forward to our anniversary, planning everything, buying present and all... now all these might just go to waste.... is it worth it? Is that little stubborness worth all these emotional damage? I really don't know.... like I always tell you.... I love you... now its all up to you.... I would wanna do all my part to make this relationship work... but would you wanna help me too? Its about compromising and loving each other for who he/she is.... its not about making someone into something you want. This is not frankestein..... We all are unique in our own way. We all have our own school of thoughts.... that's what makes each and everyone of us special. Stop asking if I can change to fulfuil your requirement. But ask instead can you accept me for who I am. I need you to tell me things. We need to communicate. As much as I wanna be GOD, I am not one so I can't "see" your thoughts or "hear" your heart. We need to communicate.... are you willing to do this with me? Is this gonna be our last anniversary or izzit the beginning of many more to come? You decide.
Spoke to boss yesterday while he was driving me home. He told me its very tough to be a soldier's wife or girlfriend.... he is the 3rd person to tell me this... my ex boss, my boss's boss.... all told me before... and I must agree. Being a soldier's girl is really no easy task.... looking at the kind of working hours we have, the number of overseas trips, the number of OT and stuffs like that... Not many girls can take it.... I think about her, and all the years that we've spent together... it really saddened me that things have to end up this way. I always believe that any couples that can endure and pull through the hardship of a guy's military career, is a couple that will last. Only true love can withstand such terrible times a guy have to go through. Our relationship went through many obstacles. We went through many rough times since the day we got together. 4 years is neither long nor short... but it certainly brings back lots of memories. I did the most foolish thing in my life by breaking her heart and destroying her trust for me. Trust.... once broken, its hard to build again. She gave me another chance and I promised myself never to break her heart again. I cherish her more than anything else. But the scar is still there. She still finds it hard to believe in me.
She blasts at me again on sunday.... over something that I really thought nothing of.... its just chatting with a poly classmate without telling her. As much as I thought its nothing, she sees it as a big issue. A big issue of broken promise. I was stunned by the outbreak as I really did not expect it. I could not believe that she can actually lashes out on me over things like that. As angry and upset as I were, I do not blame her. She has all the rights to be angry. She has all the rights to choose not to trust me. She has all the rights to feel insecure. I am not blaming her.... she is not wrong. But I did not think that I was wrong too. My heart was totally shattered when she say that we should stay away from each other for a while... does that mean a breakup? I really do not know. How do you find solution to a problem where both party feel that no one is in the wrong?
Maybe I really don't understand her enough. From my point of view, a lot of such quarrels can be avoided. If she sees that I am talking to someone and wish to know who is that person, she can always ask, and I'll be more than willing to tell her. But she choose to remain silence and wait for me to tell her. And if its slips my mind or if I forget to tell her. She'll lash out on me. Is this on purpose? I don't know. Quote an example..... you are driving on the expressway and on the expressway you are EXPECTED to travel at high speed. You are travelling at a high speed when from far you saw this car in front of you braking and is slowing down. Would you:
1. Maintain your speed. Cuz its an expressway and you don't give a damn why he slows down.
2. Slow down you vehicle to avoid a collision. Alternatively, change lane,
What would you choose? If you co-relate this to our problem, she choose answer 1. She know that if I slip my mind and forget to tell her things, she'll get angry, we'll quarrel and everyone will be unhappy. But she insist on keeping quiet. Why? Because I am expected to remember to tell her everything so if I forget, then I deserve the unhappiness. But am I only one who will be unhappy? Think about it.
If she choose answer 2, she would prompt me by asking me who am I talking to. I'll tell her. In that way, she gets to know what she wants, I get to say what I gotta say. Everyone is happy. Doesn't this makes more sense?
Why do you choose to remain silent? Why do you insist on seeing your car crash on the car in front? What do you benefit from the crash? Nothing. I don't know if anyone understand the example I'm trying to co-relate with. It just comes into my mind as I type.
I don't know.... we can be enjoying each others company so much and yet time and time again quarrel over such small issue. I say small issue because I see it as something that can be solved. Just a matter of both party putting in more effort. I am wrong cuz I forgot. You are not totally blameless too cuz you fail to ask me. Why always quarrel this? I have so many friends, I speak to so many people, how would I remember to report to you everything and how many more times do we have to quarrel over this?
I've been looking forward to our anniversary, planning everything, buying present and all... now all these might just go to waste.... is it worth it? Is that little stubborness worth all these emotional damage? I really don't know.... like I always tell you.... I love you... now its all up to you.... I would wanna do all my part to make this relationship work... but would you wanna help me too? Its about compromising and loving each other for who he/she is.... its not about making someone into something you want. This is not frankestein..... We all are unique in our own way. We all have our own school of thoughts.... that's what makes each and everyone of us special. Stop asking if I can change to fulfuil your requirement. But ask instead can you accept me for who I am. I need you to tell me things. We need to communicate. As much as I wanna be GOD, I am not one so I can't "see" your thoughts or "hear" your heart. We need to communicate.... are you willing to do this with me? Is this gonna be our last anniversary or izzit the beginning of many more to come? You decide.
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